This is a condensed/edited version of part of an essay I wrote about being funny some time ago.
It’s concerned with knowing how weird to be when you’re being funny.
Like, you know you need to say something funny or at least interesting. How weird is too weird?
This essay is about that.
The Clock Method
To sum up: being funny is about saying the right thing most of the time, and then saying the wrong thing.
What is the “wrong” thing? Here is the world’s worst and most useless explanation.
Imagine a clock. An analog clock with numbers. The numbers on the clock are a scale of “weirdness of things you could say.” At NOON are things you say when you’re just trying to blend in. And all down the side are increasingly weird things to say. Until you arrive at six — that’s the exact opposite of normal. For the sake of this metaphor, there is no left side of the clock.
Let’s say someone asks you “what are your plans after college?”
At “noon” you have normal answers like this:
“I just don’t know. Get a job, figure things out.”
“I’m looking for engineering jobs — hopefully on the west coast.”
“For right now, moving home. But I want to be in New York as soon as possible.”
Right? Pretty normal.
Move a bit away from noon down the clock, into weirder answers. Let’s say you’re at 2 (10 minutes away from “normal”). Then you’ve got answers that are a bit odd, but still somewhat attached to reality. These are fun.
“For me, it’s all about good loving. I’m looking for ladies.”
“I’m into changing personalities. New person every day.” (Thumbs pointed at own head)
“Married immediately. Currently very single.”
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